Real Story

Help

By Twitchy_T on 18-Aug

Not in a good mind set right now. Sorry. It's quite... negitive

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How are you?

'How are you?'

"Still Breathing."

They give a small laugh.

'That's always good'

I fake laugh...

"Yeah, depends who you ask i guess"

I fake a smile as they laugh again.

 

Emotions are hard to express

Feelings are hard to explain.

People will never really understand.

 

You try to let them in

But they dont notice the door is unlocked

Or they ignore the door completely

Deciding they dont want to know.

 

They will get sick of you being like you are

Always sad, down or needing help

They say they care... They'll pretend to listen

But everyone has their limits.

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Comments

Flea | Reply 21 August 2012, 12:22 PM

I think you're right about people having their limits. Unfortunately not everyone is willing, or prepared enough to help us when we need it. I'd have to disagree with you about that applying to every single person though.

I pushed a lot of people away without meaning to when I was in trouble. It was the worst time to have that happen too obviously because that's the time I needed friends around me the most.

Then something unusual happened. There was this guy in my year who I wasn't really close friends with at all. We hung out a bit in year 7 but not a lot. I think at one point I kinda bullied him too a long time ago but we're well over that now.. Anyway, he saw that I was depressed and that the rest of my group kinda bailed on me so he just came and chatted to me one day. I don't know why but I opened up heaps to him. I had felt so numb before that and I didn't think I could never really talk to my friends about it because they wouldn't care and wouldn't understand. Maybe that's why I told him what was going on - I needed to tell someone and he seemed like a fairly good objective third party. I was just so pissed off with everything and everyone that it had to come out somehow.

He and I became best mates. It wasn't all one-sided. I ended up helping him through drama later on when he needed support and when I was able to give it. After that it wasn't all just about providing support either, our friendship became more even and changed to be more fun. It was all really unexpected. This guy who I kinda knew once becoming a really important part of my life when everyone else I knew just left me.

It might sound like a long shot and maybe it's not the same for everyone, but it worked out really well in my case at a time when I had given up on everyone.

I hope this helps in some way. Take care.

Twitchy_T 21 August 2012, 5:24 PM

Thanks Flea :)

Its really good you found someone to help out and tell things too. Im glad you also get to help him. I know that helps when you can talk to someone about everything. Share stories and help each other get better.

My story isn't a happy one and its not exciting so I wont share it. But basically this story is about how I used to have friends that listened, cared and put up with all my shit. But in the end no one wants a confused chick that cant figure out her own emotions as a friend ... anyway. Im really happy to hear about you and your friend. It gives me hope that at least one person will get better. Even if its not me.

All the best

XXx

Twitchy_T 22 August 2012, 10:20 AM

I'll try Flea. Thank you :)

Flea 22 August 2012, 11:24 AM

Yeah i was really fortunate in hind sight. It worked out really well for me in the end.

I'd ask you not to give up hope for yourself though, or at the very least be open to the idea of something or someone being able to help when that comes along. It would be a shame if help came to you in a way that you weren't expecting and then you missed out on the opportunity because you'd just thought it wasn't possible.

Mine was a very unexpected support at a time when I was convinced that nothing would ever get better.

Don't give up. It'll be worth it one day. :)

Twitchy_T 24 August 2012, 5:35 PM

Sorry about the late reply.

I'll try :) I'm trying to stay positive and open minded about getting better. I'm opening up a bit more to people and so far it hasn't been too much of a negitive response. So thats good. :)

Thanks for all your help. Without you guys I don't even know where i would be.

xXx

Flea 26 August 2012, 10:11 PM

Sorry for the late response from me too! Been a bit of a busy weekend so haven't had much time to get on here.

I'm SO happy to hear that you're still trying to stay positive and starting to open up a bit. It can be a bit scary at first and it might take time, but talking to the people who will actually listen and really care about you is such a comforting thing. It can make a huge difference.

I'm really happy to hear this Twitchy_T! :) You should be proud of yourself too I think.

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